When I was pregnant with Amelia, I always thought it would be so easy to return to work. Little did I know how many feelings and emotions would come with it. I always knew that I would have to return to work (not sure it would be financially possible for me to stay home full time right now and I also like having the money to travel to Ontario to see my family), but actually coming to terms with leaving your child is hard. So, so hard.
As I started thinking about actually leaving Amelia with someone else, I found that I had a lot of guilt. Am I doing the right thing? Is she going thrive and be loved by the day home provider? Will she know that I still love her and wish I could be there with her? We have found a wonderful day home provider and Amelia has started her trial with her and it's gone better than I thought so far. That definitely helps ease my momma worries.
I know that being around other children will be good for Amelia- socialization and learning to share, etc are all important. I also know that having adult conversations and using my brain again will be good for me. But that also doesn't make it easier to leave your child.
I think the biggest thing (besides being away from Amelia so much) that I worry about it is how do you get everything done? I'm used to being able to do laundry, walk Harley, get groceries, etc all during the day and now my time to do that will be drastically cut down. I know that cleaning and laundry can always wait, but I'm such a perfectionist. Does anyone have any tips? I'd love some about getting dinner made without using all of my time up with Amelia after work.
In the mean time, I'll be cuddling and spending as much time as I can before I go back to work on Monday. If you need me, you can find me probably shedding a few tears as well :)